A funeral for an account

Being the drama qu... king that I am, I left youtube and the account AandJinLOVE with 2 words.
DONE, GONE.

I never got so many responses to any of my other videos.
People wrote me very personal stories and very emotional emails telling me how much they feel for me.
The comments I recieved on my last video were very nice, too.

I had a few talks about my decision with two nice people I met trough youtube, Lucas and Michael.
And of course there is always my best friend Dominik who I love to death (yeah get your head
out of your ass Dominik, you'll only see me admit this once in a lifetime).
They helped me a lot by just talking about this and not pushing the topic away. It was there, all the time and even when we changed topics for a moment we always came back to it.
I also talked to a girl about this. Her name is Sarah. She told me that although I may not believe
her now, I will eventualy laugh about this whole thing when I grow older.

I also wanna say that those who sent me personal messages or comments are really really nice people. Reading all the kind words from some older men made me think for a minute. Why is every guy who wants to share his wisdom and experience in life with a younger person labeled a pedophile?
They just wrote me "letters on a screen"... how is that gonna do me harm in any way? So to all you nice people out there who cared for me so much to sit down and spend half an hour of your time to console a broken heart I want to say: thank you very much, mission accomplished.

Now... what I wanna do and kinda already did is... I burried the account AandJinLove on Youtube.
I was asked to leave the videos there and I will leave them up. Who knows... maybe I go back
in 5 years and watch them again and laugh about myself.

I'm not leaving youtube for good... whoever thought that is CRAZY. Youtube is AWESOME.
I created a new account. It's http://www.youtube.com/ntotheitothec

I just needed a few days off the internet to finish what I had started: the process of getting over
this guy.

Now I'm back and I'm better than ever and as I said on my latest video.
I'm gonna KICK SOME ASS :o) (yaaay, butch me).